I recently had the privilege of conducting 16 one-hour coaching sessions over a period of 2 days. It was a large number of individual sessions in a short period of time, providing me with a unique opportunity to gain valuable insights.
While one would think that 16 diversely unique people would have 16 individual stories of successes, challenges, and difficulties, this is only partly true. We all have similar issues running through our lives. How we handle these issues has a profound effect on our mental state and happiness.
3 Areas to focus on:
- Relationships. Healthy business and personal relationships are a vital component of success and happiness. The cornerstones of healthy relationships are:
Trust – we all know that trust is earned. And it really is so. Trust is in the things we do. Trust is saying we will do something and then doing it. Trust is to be there for each other in times of need. Reliability and being supportive is crucial to building and maintaining trust.
Integrity – is about being honest and truthful, both to yourself and to others. Integrity is not a skill or a learned behavior – it is a personal choice that one makes. A healthy relationship is not possible in a scenario where there is no integrity.
Being authentic – What you see is what you get. What does that really mean? It means being true to yourself. It means being genuine and being your original self. To be something or someone other than who you really are is not being authentic.
Relationships built in the absence of mutual respect and trust will become toxic, resulting in a total lack of effective functioning. Productive and healthy relationships are the cornerstones of personal well-being, happiness and healthy and productive business relationships. Good relationships make for good business.
- Ownership. Accepting who and what we are. Ownership and acceptance of our circumstances, our life, and our relationships. It is easy to believe that our world is one of chance, fate, and luck. This allows us to blame everything else but ourselves for our misfortune. It is a natural step from here to feel that we are a victim of circumstances and of others plotting against us. It hurts, but somehow blaming and choosing to be the victim seems the easy route to go. It takes courage to own up to and to accept that you are the creator of your own life and your circumstances. To take responsibility and to seek the truth takes humility and courage. Only once you do this, you are free from being a victim.
To create a healthy work environment:
Pause before you speak – many of us talk first and think after. We say things we may later regret. Pause, it gives you precious seconds to say the right thing.
Think before you write – how many of us have received an email or message which we didn’t like, got upset and shot off a response only to regret the content afterward? People have destroyed their own brand by making such comments or remarks which they later utterly regret.
- Reflection. Self-development and growth require introspection and self-reflection. This can be very daunting. It requires being brutally honest with yourself. Seeing oneself as you genuinely are takes courage.
Ask and answer the following truthfully:
What do others see and experience through my behaviors?
What value system do you reflect? Are you acting according to your own value system or someone else’s values? Often people project what they believe to be appropriate, but which does not reflect their values.
The good news is that regular introspection and reflection eventually becomes a habit. Accepting the truth and actively choosing to do something to improve yourself, becomes easier the more you reflect.
Rewarding relationships, taking ownership of your own life and a healthy habit of self-reflection, have a profound effect on one’s mental state and general happiness. This makes for an extraordinary life.